Football Jesus

January 7, 2013 at 10:04 pm (Uncategorized)

So, how about that national title game. Mr. Roberts, I regret to say that you were absolutely correct and I was wrong–a total blowout. I assumed it would be much closer.

Fortuitously for me, my father and I play volleyball in a rec league on Monday nights (the one perk of being back in Camas!) and so I only caught the first half. Which was honestly more than enough. Inspired by some of the wittier things my friends have posted on facebook, I have some musings about the game.

Everybody says that Jesus/God roots for Notre Dame (the Holy Ghost, oddly enough, is more of basketball guy and has an abiding love of St. John’s), and I am sure that’s true. Unfortunately for all you ND fans, Nick Saban is probably the devil, so you knew he would gunk up the works if you give him a month to scheme.

Jesus’ teams also tend to be susceptible to crossing routes, USC, Michigan State, and a lot of confusion arising from how they are supposed to interpret the playbook.

As for me, I prefer touchdown Buddha. We got one of these statues in at Ross when I was working there, and I decided to buy it the next day. When I came back it was gone–and we never got another one in again. If you’ve never been to Ross they just get a truckload of random crap every day and put it out in the stores. Working in the stock room was fun simply because it was like Christmas every morning. The more you know. Anyway, missing out on touchdown Buddha will always be a little heartbreaking, but perhaps I will find another someday. I could always order it on the internet if I wanted, I suppose. But until I find a steady source of income I will keep down on the frivolous purchases.

ImageTouchdown Buddha in all his glory

Can I level with you for a moment? I’m not entirely sure what touchdown Buddha means. I would assume that he is simply joyful because he is living totally in the present moment, in tune with reality and existence (though that is a simplification). But I don’t know 100%. A cursory google search of “What does touchdown Buddha really mean?” turned up nothing, although I found I could like “Touchdown Buddha” on facebook if I wish. 45 likes. Welcome to America everyone.



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