July 15

July 15, 2013 at 10:01 pm (Uncategorized)

I can only speak for me, but I will soon be feeling 23. Not too different from 22, but with one less current top 40 pop song to describe my life. Fortunately there are (and will continue to be) others. 

Life just keeps on rushing by, and sometimes I feel more like I am being washed by a current than doing much in the way of directing my life. I need to take charge and be more assertive, I think. The more I reflect, the more I realize that I actually am pretty sure what I want. Unfortunately, getting what I want is probably not in the cards, for reasons beyond my control. You can apply that to jobs, relationships, life circumstances, and more. It’s ok, really. I am confident in my ability to get things to turn out well, and I believe in myself enough to know that I am worth being in a job where I can do great work and be valued, be in a relationship where I can love and be loved in equal measure, and find the kind of stability and mental peace that allows me to do exciting and mundane things with equal aplomb. 

I got a chance to go up to Moscow this weekend very briefly, and I had a great time. Getting to see friends that are more like family is always worth it. I do have a fairly sizable fear that we will lose touch and drift apart. It’s probably unavoidable, but I don’t like to think about it. Time will tell.

 

I am trying to get a better handle on my life, on me, on being the person I WANT to be rather than who I am. I am trying to move in a forward direction. Keep your fingers crossed or think a good thought for me if you find a moment. 

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